Much-loved royal person Prince Philip has been rushed to hospital today after suffering from an unexplained bowel disturbance.
Official reports state that he fell ill at one of the Queen’s renowned garden parties.
Some commentators claim he was eating a sausage-on-a-stick at the time but it went down the wrong ‘plughole’.
Exploratory surgery is to be undertaken on Friday in a desperate bid to locate the sausage.
Unconfirmed reports that an increasingly frustrated Prince Charles supplied the sausage from his own ‘extra-thick’ organic range have been strenuously denied by palace officials.